Happy Friday, Mes Amies!

So, today is another one of those #thoughtsfriday posts.  I know that the title of this blog post might come off as harsh. 

From the time that we are young girls, we are taught to play nice always and befriend everyone that you encounter.  As we grow, this is not always the best thing for us. There is an old adage that you are the sum of the 5 people with whom you spend the most time. Whether this is true or not, there are sadly some toxic people who will wreak havoc on your mental well being. These are the people that you must remove from your life.  It does not matter if its your sister, your cousin, your college roommate, etc. NOBODY is allowed to bring you harm. You are allowed to (and should) have an enough self love to not stand for making room for any of the following types of people in your life.

1) The One Who Seeks Out Conflict

You KNOW who I mean. This person has a LOT of pent up anger. They purposely misconstrue the words of others in order to fain offence. They are the ones who use their social media to post inflammatory things just hoping they can bait someone, anyone into fighting them. In public places such as stores they are hyper vigilant for even the smallest perceived slight. They are just itching to berate some poor employee and complain to the manager. Let this person fight with you in their mind. Do not give them the chance to do it in real life.

2) The One Who Speaks Badly Of Others

This person has something negative to say about EVERYONE. There isn't a person alive will not have something said about them behind their backs. They seek out ANY chance to speak ill of others. When you say something complimentary about someone, this person chimes in with a "Yes, but..." and then proceeds to take the ball and run their mouth with slander. The person who does this is unhappy to the core with themselves. They are desperately trying to make themselves feel better. These people will talk poorly about you the 1st time the opportunity arises. 

( Interesting side note on this one. My dear friend who is a psychiatrist told me that this is a way to see what a person dislikes about themselves. "If you spot it, you got it." Meaning what someone says disparagingly about another is actually something that they dislike about themselves.)   

3) The One Who Is Envious Of You

You cannot be friends with someone who wants your life. - Oprah Winfrey

This person appears, at least initially to be a supportive friend. Yet, their envy and resentment towards you makes them anything but. ( Read More Here)  This is the person who is secretly rooting against you. They might go as far a try to sabotage you.

4) The One With Addictions

First things first, no we are not necessarily talking about substance abuse here. Addictions certainly could refer to drugs or alcohol. However, shopping, gaming, the internet among countless other things can fall under this umbrella.  Absolutely, having empathy and compassion for this person is very important. Remember though, you cannot let others make their problems your problems.     You cannot let the shopping addict convince you to drain your savings. You cannot let the alcoholic guilt you into drinking with them on a Monday night.

5) The Entitled One

This is the person who believes that the world  needs to meet them on their terms at all times.

When they are not catered too, they believe themselves to be the maligned party. 

If they have a deadline to meet, you are expected to cancel your plans to help them meet it. 

If you are planning a dinner party , you'd better put their dietary concerns ahead of the other guests.

This is the person who actually believes that their wants and needs should be priority number 1 to everyone else.

I understand that it is not possible to entirely avoid these people. If Linda from accounting is like this, you cannot just quit your job. If your BFF's sister in law fits this bill, you cannot always avoid her.

The idea here is to keep these people at an arm's length and never, ever let them into your inner circle.

Do not sacrifice yourself in an attempt to "be nice" to others, Particularly, those who do not deserve it. 

Well, this one was sort of heavy. Onward with light and love.

Have a beautiful weekend.

XO,

SheShe

Happy Hump Day, Mes Amies. Here we are 1/2 way through another week.

Nowadays, its close to impossible to remember when skinny jeans were not the standard. Somewhere around 2002 (replacing the unflattering painter jean) or so, they became very current. Around 2006, they became the standard.  2006 was 14 years ago. You'll be hard pressed to find any trend that hangs around for that long. For many of us, it is the only style of jeans we have worn as adults. For others, we have distant memories of adorning boot cut jeans.

Regardless, now we are seeing the reemergence of a trend from the late 80's / early 90's, the "Mom Jean". The Mom jean is high waisted with a straight leg.

Are you ready to embrace the Mom jean trend? I just started to. I'm ready to go all in.

First of all, now I understand why people always used to refer to jeans as being "So comfortable."  When you've been wearing skinny jeans for 10+ years, its hard to imagine jeans being considered comfortable.  This cut of jeans though truly gives leggings a run for their money in terms of comfort. Yes, really.

However, let me tell you .... this style will take a bit of getting used too. When I first tried on a pair of these jeans, I immediately recoiled. I thought I looked so frumpy. I did have to try on several pairs. I might of been I just got used to seeing myself in them, finding a pair that I loved or a combination of both before I found a pair that I loved. I had to keep reminding myself, jus because I'm used to seeing myself in the skinny jean (and the fact that I own 20+ pairs of them) , doesn't make them any less dated and on their way out.  Last Week I shared my favorite "Mom Jeans". I'm well aware that that pair is stupid expensive though.  Today, I'll share a few pairs that will look and feel just as good.

                                                         1822 Denim Ripped High Waist Jeans 

This pair comes in under $50.00 Woo Hoo!   You can try the look without forking over a lot off cash.

Truly, unless you find a pair that you love directly out of the gate, don't start out by spending a ton. 

Like I said earlier, it probably will be an adjustment time as you get used to seeing yourself in such a different silhouette. 

To me, it is worth it. These are so comfortable. Say good-bye to any muffin top or visible "crack" shows.

Give them a try, you'll thank me!

XO,

SheShe

Hi Mes Amies!

Happy Monday! Do you like my new 'do?  I was itching for something more "autumn".  I must admit that I'm kind of obsessed with the tones and dimension my hair now has.

Do you mixed it up when the weather gets cooler?  Here are a few of my personal favorites for fall hair.

 

Honey infused light brown. I love how this shade walks the line between blonde and brown.

This flaming red is the exact color my mom and one of my brother's were naturally graced with. My other brother, dad and myself were blondes... we had a lil family rivalry going on. Before I was born, it was 2-2..I was the tie breaker.

Speaking of blonde, this creamy blonde is on point. It still has lots of platinum, that's important to those of us who can never get it blonde enough. However, it has darker pieces mixed in. 

They call this shade "brond". It is equal parts blonde and brown. It is 100% flattering, almost universally. 

The last on e is called "brack". So brown, its almost black. Personally, I could never pull tis shade off, as my complexion is too light for it. Regardless, its absolutely stunning.

There you go. What do you think ? Which color would you choose?

XO,

SheShe